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W. S. D., our linguistic reporter, has at last succeeded in translating (via Chinook) the famous German marching song and we have much pleasure in submitting it to our readers:

The watch on line, the watch on line, Which costs one dollar in the spring, And which you grease with bacon rind, And carry on a piece of string, Determines longitudes so true That District Lots in Coast Range Two Are found to be in Cariboo.

Description for the Future Estate of Kaiser Wilhelm

All and singular that certain parcel or tract of land and premises situate lying and being in the District of Sahara and consisting of one ever-diminishing water hole and one ant hill, and which may be more particularly described as follows:

Commencing at the intersection of the easterly boundary of the 10 a.m. shadow of the ant hill with the H. W. M. of the water hole, thence by the magnet to a place in the sun, thence by gravity to the bottom of said water hole, thence on a zenith bearing 42 centimetres more or less to the surface of the said water hole, thence by dead reckoning to the northeast corner of the 2 p.m. shadow of the said ant hill, thence on a closing bearing to the point of commencement, and containing one grease spot be the same more or less.

Accepted for registry at the Allied Registry Office at Berlin.

Our Abyssinian correspondent sends us an account of an incident that occurred on his way towards that seat of war. Many officers had been on leave in England, amongst them being several generals. The transport on which they returned was much crowded and consequently there was always a demand for baths. A certain general with a liver was kept an unduly long time waiting for his bath one morning. Getting exasperated he knocked at the door and called "You are a d-----d long time, sir; who are you and what are you doing; don't keep me waiting, sir, I am a general." A voice from the inside was heard to shout, "D--------d glad to hear it, old chap, buck up, so am I."

Another Battleship Damaged

It is reported on good authority that at a late hour this evening the first-class battleship "Good Resolutions," launched on January 1st, 1915 was badly damaged, but that hopes were still entertained that she would not prove a total loss as from last accounts she was taking in very little water.

Little Egypt, since adorning herself with the thin red line, has been admitted to the family circle.

Financial Note

Let that high tide of prosperity come. We can swim.

The office boy has at last succeeded in translating "Deutschland uber alles." He says it means, "It's all over the the Dutch."

Berlin.--It is officially announced that the British navy has been sunk.

Hun authorized.

Sir Richard McBride announces that the great dirigible which went as a contribution from British Columbia has arrived safely in France and has been in action. Our war correspondent has cleverly depicted on our front page the disorganization of the enemy in the first engagement. One of the great features of this dirigible is that by a secret process the necessary inflation can be sustained against any shrinkage due to temperature variations or diffusion.

Important Meeting

A meeting of the shareholders and depositors in the Corporation of B. C. Land Surveyors was held this afternoon in the Board of Trade rooms for the purpose of considering the most appropriate method of placing their reserve funds at the service of the Empire. After much discussion it was moved by N. F. Townsend and seconded by W. G. McElhanney, and carried with but one dissenting vote, that the "S.S. McDiarmid," which is now lying idle, be charted and laden with copies of the Special Surveys Act, together with the various and varying official interpretations thereof, and that the same be forwarded to the front and that the German army be required to comply therewith, so that in their resulting bewilderment they may fall an easy prey to our army.

Commander John Hirsch has done effective work with his great gun in razing H ----- E ----- L----- L-----. (Passed by censor.)

Serial Story

(By Bell-Irving Cobb)

Chapter 23. The Earle Cond his orders to Cleveland from the enemy. The Burden of taking Monckton on the border of Holland had fallen upon him. On the Green behind the Abbott's Garden Leigh an army growing Biggar each hour and whose Wright Wing reached the Townsend on the Hill. "To charge Unwin the Downton portion of the city will mean a heavy Price," he said, "yet when we Burnett they will have to retreat." The Horie old general hastened to Boulton his armor and advanced at Gray dawn along the Rhodes across the Moore. The Coates of the enemy showed brown across the Lee, while the Groves formed a screen enabling our forces to Harris them Long before they were discovered. Davidson, a Taylor and Draper by trade and Patrick by surname, in a Dart towards a Bauer in the Wood found fair Hope a captive and slew the Black enemy. She seeing the Gore of our wounded hero ran for a Leach, who bandaged Hermon with White Cotton at his House. "Sweet-man," she whispered, "there is a Cartwright here in which we may ride to the Kirk and find a Priest and then at the Booth of the Baker we may have some Rice, Pye and a Meyerstein of beer." At the completion of the Revell our hero sighed and said, "This Aldous for me and I'll no Morkill any man if the King will but Grant my prayer."

(To be concluded)

SATURDAY SUNSET PRESSES, VANCOUVER, B.C.

BC Archives, MS-1901 Box 1 File 9 / RUSSELL, Alma M., 1873 - 1964. Victoria; librarian. / Selected letter to Captain J. Herrick McGregor, and a B.C.L.S. dinner menu, 1915.

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